Don Ely Jr. passed away at his home in Wilmington, DE on May 24, 2026. So, he would not be confused with Don Sr., his grandfather Oscar gave him the nickname “Bucky,” which stuck all 75 years of his life. He was also known as “Zeke” by his Phi Delta Theta fraternity brothers at Lafayette College. To Alison and Eric he was Dad, and to the six grandchildren he loved dearly, Kai and Bryce Kahn, and Nathan, Ashley, Matthew and Hannah Ely, he will be lovingly remembered as “Papa.”
Born September 18, 1950 to Don and Nancy Ely, Bucky spent his early years in Philadelphia and Roslyn, PA. When the family settled into their long-time home on Tally-Ho Drive in Ambler, PA, he was a regular contributor to the neighborhood antics around Creepy Pond. When he wasn’t on a family camping trip or riding in the back of the station wagon with his three sisters, he sought refuge listening to music, taking solo expeditions into the woods, or tinkering around the house, even once constructing his own catapult.
His scientific bent gained even more traction when Bucky completed his undergraduate degree in Chemistry at Lafayette College. He went on to Penn State, completing his PhD in Chemistry and then a post-doctoral fellowship at the University of Florida. His daughter Alison was born in Florida and the family later moved to Delaware, where his son Eric was born. Along with their mother, Kathy Gareth, Bucky raised his two kids in Wilmington, DE and worked at Dupont. Bucky spent the twilight of his career running chemistry labs at Widener University until finally retiring to spend time with family and enjoy his many hobbies.
Another constant in Bucky’s life was his friendship with his dear friend Phillip “Phillby” Elbertson. They met in the fall of 1968, living across the hall from one another freshman year at Lafayette. They stayed connected through moves to Florida and back to the east coast. Both families spent time at the beach each year and Phillby became a regular member of the Ely clan summer gatherings for many years. Diehard Eagles fans, Bucky and Phillby met up once a year to attend a game in person. Bucky would collect two hoagies from his favorite shop, one to eat at the game and the other for watching the second game back at Phillby’s house. They rarely missed a game in 40 years.
Driven by curiosity and an insatiable thirst for knowledge, Bucky was an avid movie watcher and reader, who loved stories and facts in equal measure. He read nearly every book at the local library and then some. He was just as likely to spend his time watching movies as he was reading thick volumes of history books or brushing up on the latest in quantum mechanics, genetics, and theoretical physics, just for fun. His nephews remember him as a true scientist – all it took was a well-placed question about chemistry or physics (or about any topic) to turn him into a fountain of knowledge. While rarely the first to start the family’s many spirited conversations, he never missed a chance to remark on the absurdities of daily life or chuckle from the sidelines at the sheer madness of it all.
A creature of habit, Bucky is remembered by his neighbors in Wilmington for his daily walks. He also never hesitated to spend time with his grandkids. He was a reliable ride to and from school for Kai and Bryce and made at least four trips a year to see his grandkids in New Hampshire.
Though practical at every turn, it would be a mistake to confuse Bucky’s simplicity and frugality with a lack of generosity. While he stretched the usable life of material things like clothing and furniture, he never missed an opportunity to help others or fulfill his kids’ dreams. He was generous beyond measure, contributing to weddings, homes, and family vacations. He lived his life in a way that made space for the things that mattered most: the people he loved. But he did it quietly and without fuss.
Behind the loveable curmudgeon exterior, Bucky was full of surprises – among them, a talent for ballroom dancing, which he enjoyed later in life. His softer side was evident every time a new baby joined the family, from his own kids and grandkids to his nieces, nephews, and their children, each one of them lucky to have their very own Uncle Buck! He carried his love for children to the Nemours Children’s Hospital, where he volunteered weekly. The staff at Nemours remember him as a much loved, kind and gentle giant, advocating for patients and contributing nearly 1,300 volunteer hours.
He enjoyed beach vacations with extended family in Ocean City, NJ, where he was a dependable purveyor of shrimp, clams, and cherry tomatoes still warm from his garden. Year after year, he wore the same tired but much-loved jersey and spent his days in the same timeworn beach chair. At least he was consistent, right down to his preference for Kohr Bros, butterscotch, and butter crunch ice cream. He even had a yearly ritual of marking the imaginary threshold between his week at the shore and the rest of the year. At the exact same location each year, he greeted the barrier island with a hearty hello and crossed back over the bridge at week’s end shouting “see you next year!”
Bucky is survived by his daughter Alison Ely and son Eric (Holly) Ely; their mother, Kathy Gareth; Alison’s children, Kai and Bryce, and their father, Kevin Kahn; Eric and Holly’s children, Nathan, Ashley, Matthew, and Hannah; and his three sisters, Lynn Harris, Beth Ely, and Karen (Steve) Bryk. He is also fondly remembered by many nieces and nephews and their families, along with extended family and friends. Bucky was preceded in death by his parents, Don and Nancy Ely, who surely have a beach chair waiting for him.
His cremated remains will be laid to rest with his family at Whitemarsh Cemetery in Montgomeryville, Pennsylvania. A private celebration of life will be held later this summer. The family is grateful to the McCrery and Harra Funeral Home for their caring support.
In lieu of flowers, the family kindly requests that memorial donations be made in Don’s memory to Nemours Children’s Health through Nemours.org or to Nemours Children’s Hospital, Attn: Institutional Advancement, 1600 Rockland Road, Wilmington, Delaware 19803. Nemours Children’s Hospital, Delaware, became especially meaningful to him through his volunteer work.
For online condolences visit www.mccreryandharra.com
